Hair, Clothes, Words—And What They Might Be Saying

 

Respect isn’t about agreement—it’s about awareness.

I’ve lived long enough to know not to judge a book by its cover. But I’ve also learned the cover does say something. 

Blue hair. Tattoos. A sharp suit. A flannel shirt and boots.   Whether we admit it or not, appearance sends a signal. So does the way we speak, the words we choose, and how we carry ourselves. It’s all part of how we show up in the world.

Some folks see someone with bright pink hair and immediately start making assumptions. Others see a guy in a three-piece suit and write him off as arrogant or uptight.

Both are wrong.

Because here’s the truth:

Hair color doesn’t make you unstable. Wardrobe doesn’t make you shallow. And slang doesn’t make you stupid.

But it does tell us something—if we’re paying attention.

Here’s What I’ve Learned:

Hair, wardrobe, and language are like billboards.

They’re ways people express identity, values, experiences, creativity, or culture. If it’s different from your norm, don’t let it trigger you.

As someone who’s worked with all kinds of people—business leaders, blue-collar workers, the homeless, and strangers—I’ve learned it’s best to take note of the signals people give off. Learn what they mean so you’re not caught off guard.

It’s easy to judge what we don’t understand. But when you take the time to see where someone’s coming from—what shaped them, what they’ve walked through—you start to see the bigger picture. And with that understanding comes wisdom.

You stop reacting and start responding.

You don’t just see the action—you hear the story behind it.

Understanding doesn’t mean agreeing with everything someone does. But it gives you the wisdom to handle it better.

It’s hard to hate up close.

Once you know their “why,” you see the person—not just the presentation.

That’s where connection starts.

And maybe even mutual respect.

But Here’s the Catch…

It goes both ways.

Respect isn’t just something traditional folks need to show toward people who look or think differently.

It’s something people who look or think differently need to offer right back.

If I don’t make assumptions about your hair or lifestyle, don’t make assumptions about my values or beliefs. If I speak to you with kindness, speak back with the same.

If we really want a society that welcomes differences, we’ve all got to check our attitudes—no matter what we’re wearing or how we style our hair.

Final Thought:

You don’t have to compromise who you are to be kind.

You don’t have to agree to be respectful.

And you don’t have to prove anything—just be decent.

If more of us lived that way, we’d spend less time offended…

And a whole lot more time actually making a difference.